It is best to establish the facts first. I am an Indian, well a north Indian, from Uttar Pradesh to be precise, a woman and a Muslim. As far as my parents can go back on the family tree, and it is at least seven generations, we have always been Muslims, (no conversions there) and we have always been north Indians, ‘UPwallahs’ for the sake of accuracy. So what does that make me? Believe me, it is not my idea to indulge in this vain exercise. It has been thrust upon me by a number of people I have met in the last few years who, unable to figure out a box to put me in, keep asking who I am; and are never happy with the answer. One evening, a gentleman at a party asked me where I came from, his guess was Iran. When I put him right, he asked where my father came from. ‘Same place,’ I said. ‘And his father?’ he persisted. We finally traced my seven generations, who amazingly had known little mobility I realised (with a degree of mortification) and the gentleman remained unfazed. ‘So, you are converts basically,’ he conclud